1 00:01:02,760 --> 00:01:03,830 Hello. 2 00:01:03,840 --> 00:01:06,680 Hello. Am I speaking to Mr. Philip Connarthy? 3 00:01:07,200 --> 00:01:08,880 It's pronounced "Connarty." 4 00:01:09,680 --> 00:01:13,360 Apologies. I'm calling on behalf of a Miss Kelly Royce. 5 00:01:14,000 --> 00:01:15,670 I don't know a Kelly Royce. 6 00:01:15,680 --> 00:01:19,350 Absolutely, but this regards Miss Royce's mother, Carol Royce. 7 00:01:19,360 --> 00:01:21,600 I don't know a Carol Royce either. 8 00:01:22,120 --> 00:01:24,880 Her maiden name was Hartman. Carol Hartman. 9 00:01:29,280 --> 00:01:30,720 Yeah, I know the name. 10 00:01:31,560 --> 00:01:32,560 Um... 11 00:01:35,120 --> 00:01:37,720 I knew her. Uh, sorry, why are you calling? 12 00:01:38,360 --> 00:01:40,960 I'm afraid she passed away last Wednesday. 13 00:01:42,160 --> 00:01:43,880 Her daughter wanted you to know. 14 00:01:51,960 --> 00:01:52,880 Hello? 15 00:01:53,960 --> 00:01:56,950 - Tell her I'm sorry for her loss. Uh... - Of course. 16 00:01:56,960 --> 00:01:58,520 Thank you for letting me know. 17 00:01:59,040 --> 00:02:02,400 There will, of course, be a funeral. In London. In England. 18 00:02:03,320 --> 00:02:04,400 In England. 19 00:02:06,680 --> 00:02:08,800 No, um, I can't. Uh... 20 00:02:09,320 --> 00:02:10,670 No, that's understood. 21 00:02:10,680 --> 00:02:14,520 I'm not calling about attendance. I'm from a company called Eulogy. 22 00:02:15,280 --> 00:02:16,630 Eulogy, okay. 23 00:02:16,640 --> 00:02:19,840 We're helping the family curate an immersive memorial. 24 00:02:20,640 --> 00:02:22,190 Immersive memorial. Mm-hmm. 25 00:02:22,200 --> 00:02:24,830 We've been contacting names in her mother's old papers, 26 00:02:24,840 --> 00:02:26,470 which is where you were listed. 27 00:02:26,480 --> 00:02:29,550 Locating people who knew Carol in her youth has been challenging. 28 00:02:29,560 --> 00:02:33,110 If you could contribute a memory, it would mean a great deal to the family. 29 00:02:33,120 --> 00:02:37,390 - It was all so long ago, and I can't, um-- - Well, you won't have to write anything. 30 00:02:37,400 --> 00:02:41,160 The system curates your recollections and uploads them for the memorial. 31 00:02:41,680 --> 00:02:44,230 - Would you like to take part? - I'm not sure. 32 00:02:44,240 --> 00:02:45,910 It's entirely voluntary. 33 00:02:45,920 --> 00:02:49,280 If it's easier, we can just send you the kit, and you can decide then. 34 00:02:49,800 --> 00:02:50,750 The kit? 35 00:03:44,560 --> 00:03:46,040 - Hello? - Ah! 36 00:03:47,840 --> 00:03:48,920 Hello? 37 00:03:53,040 --> 00:03:54,190 Hello? 38 00:03:54,200 --> 00:03:57,830 You don't have to speak directly into me. Sorry. I know, weird thing to say. 39 00:03:57,840 --> 00:03:58,910 Sorry. 40 00:03:58,920 --> 00:04:01,470 I've got a bit of an opening spiel I need to do here. 41 00:04:01,480 --> 00:04:03,000 - Go for it. - Okay. 42 00:04:04,320 --> 00:04:07,190 Today, we celebrate the life of Carol Royce. 43 00:04:08,120 --> 00:04:10,750 As guide, my role is to help you reminisce, relive, 44 00:04:10,760 --> 00:04:13,110 and to curate your fondest memories of her. 45 00:04:13,120 --> 00:04:16,470 Yeah, can we maybe skip the intro? Just tell me what you need me to do. 46 00:04:16,480 --> 00:04:17,630 Okay. Uh... 47 00:04:17,640 --> 00:04:21,390 So first, let's, um... let's calibrate. 48 00:04:21,400 --> 00:04:25,510 Simply place the guide disc, uh, that's me, on your temple. 49 00:04:27,400 --> 00:04:30,390 - This, like, on the side of my, like... - Mm-hmm. 50 00:04:30,400 --> 00:04:31,640 That's it. 51 00:04:33,000 --> 00:04:35,510 Now all you have to do is think of Carol. 52 00:04:35,520 --> 00:04:37,710 Well, I haven't done that for a long time. 53 00:04:37,720 --> 00:04:39,120 Mm-hmm. Understood. 54 00:04:39,640 --> 00:04:41,560 But try to recall her now. 55 00:04:42,080 --> 00:04:44,990 Close your eyes and picture her face. 56 00:04:55,640 --> 00:04:57,710 Okay, uh, not really getting anything. 57 00:04:57,720 --> 00:05:00,910 Oh, well... sorry, but, um... 58 00:05:00,920 --> 00:05:03,350 Just, uh... just try to focus. 59 00:05:03,360 --> 00:05:05,520 I am, but it's hard to, uh... 60 00:05:06,040 --> 00:05:07,360 To see her clearly? 61 00:05:09,120 --> 00:05:09,990 Yes. 62 00:05:10,000 --> 00:05:11,790 At first, getting hold of a memory 63 00:05:11,800 --> 00:05:14,670 feels like trying to grab a river with your hands. 64 00:05:14,680 --> 00:05:17,790 - Oh boy. - Yeah, sorry, not my words. 65 00:05:17,800 --> 00:05:20,030 That's what the, uh, brochure says. 66 00:05:20,040 --> 00:05:21,790 What helps are tangible prompts. 67 00:05:21,800 --> 00:05:24,190 Photos, songs, mementos. That kind of thing. 68 00:05:24,200 --> 00:05:25,550 Can't you supply photos? 69 00:05:25,560 --> 00:05:28,270 Oh, I'm not allowed to provide external material. 70 00:05:28,280 --> 00:05:30,270 - It would get mixed up with your memories. - Right. 71 00:05:30,280 --> 00:05:32,830 They do it this way to keep the recollections accurate. 72 00:05:32,840 --> 00:05:33,750 Right, right, right. 73 00:05:33,760 --> 00:05:36,310 But if you grant access to your photo cloud, 74 00:05:36,320 --> 00:05:37,910 I can search for images of Carol. 75 00:05:37,920 --> 00:05:41,070 Smartphones and clouds didn't exist back when I knew her. 76 00:05:41,080 --> 00:05:44,840 Um, okay, but do you have any physical photos? 77 00:06:29,200 --> 00:06:30,990 - Are you there? - Yeah, did you find some? 78 00:06:31,000 --> 00:06:32,520 - Uh, a few. - A few? 79 00:06:33,560 --> 00:06:34,510 Okay, three. 80 00:06:34,520 --> 00:06:37,670 - I can process up to 1,500 photos. - And I got you three. 81 00:06:37,680 --> 00:06:40,800 They recommend a minimum of six different images. 82 00:06:41,400 --> 00:06:43,480 - Can we just get going? - Absolutely. 83 00:06:45,000 --> 00:06:46,790 - So? - So pop me back on. 84 00:06:46,800 --> 00:06:50,160 Lay out the first image you'd like to import and then look at it. 85 00:06:52,520 --> 00:06:54,550 - Literally just look at it? - That's right. 86 00:06:54,560 --> 00:06:59,430 Okay. Uh, the first one is, uh... this. 87 00:06:59,440 --> 00:07:01,230 Okay. What are we looking at here? 88 00:07:01,240 --> 00:07:03,950 That's the day I met Carol. This would've been in Brooklyn. 89 00:07:03,960 --> 00:07:05,910 Rooftop barbecue at The Coop. 90 00:07:05,920 --> 00:07:08,840 - The Coop? - Uh, yeah. It used to be a squat. Um... 91 00:07:09,360 --> 00:07:13,160 The idea was it was a co-op, so everyone just called it Coop, hence The Coop. 92 00:07:13,840 --> 00:07:15,550 I mean, we were just kids, really, 93 00:07:15,560 --> 00:07:19,720 but we called ourselves artists, musicians... misfits. 94 00:07:20,400 --> 00:07:25,920 Well, believe it or not, that, yeah, that young man is me, and that is Carol. 95 00:07:27,240 --> 00:07:29,590 What, the... the woman with her back to us? 96 00:07:29,600 --> 00:07:30,830 Yeah. 97 00:07:30,840 --> 00:07:33,310 We're looking for a clear recollection of her. 98 00:07:33,320 --> 00:07:34,510 This is what I have. 99 00:07:34,520 --> 00:07:38,080 We can enhance the moment by entering the image. 100 00:07:39,040 --> 00:07:40,070 Shall we go in? 101 00:07:40,080 --> 00:07:43,640 - What do you mean "go in"? - It's easiest to just show you. 102 00:07:54,360 --> 00:07:55,830 Jesus Christ. 103 00:07:58,160 --> 00:07:59,470 - Hi. Sorry. - Ah! 104 00:08:00,560 --> 00:08:02,240 - Oh. - It's me. 105 00:08:02,760 --> 00:08:04,030 - Your guide. - Holy crap. 106 00:08:04,040 --> 00:08:05,990 I didn't... didn't mean to make you jump. 107 00:08:06,000 --> 00:08:08,790 No, it... it's not... It's just that this is... 108 00:08:08,800 --> 00:08:11,680 Yeah. Take a moment to get your bearings. 109 00:08:19,800 --> 00:08:22,240 This is the photograph fused with your memories. 110 00:08:22,760 --> 00:08:23,830 Some parts are missing, 111 00:08:23,840 --> 00:08:26,880 but details appear as and when your memories fill out. 112 00:08:31,440 --> 00:08:35,390 So when this was taken, this was before you and Carol got together? 113 00:08:35,400 --> 00:08:36,630 Huh... 114 00:08:36,640 --> 00:08:38,790 Well, I never said we got together. 115 00:08:38,800 --> 00:08:42,120 Oh, come on. Look at the way you're looking at her. 116 00:08:42,680 --> 00:08:45,870 And I'm guessing she was looking back at you the same way. 117 00:08:47,280 --> 00:08:48,640 I'd made her laugh. 118 00:08:50,120 --> 00:08:51,390 She was new in the house. 119 00:08:51,400 --> 00:08:53,590 I didn't know her, but I wanted to, 120 00:08:53,600 --> 00:08:55,160 and I'd made her laugh, 121 00:08:55,720 --> 00:08:56,880 and she looked... 122 00:08:57,440 --> 00:08:58,870 - Oh Christ. - It's okay. 123 00:08:58,880 --> 00:09:01,030 No, there's no... Um, I can't see her face. 124 00:09:01,040 --> 00:09:02,390 It'll come to you. 125 00:09:02,400 --> 00:09:05,750 Try to focus on what you can recall of this moment. 126 00:09:07,120 --> 00:09:08,040 Okay. 127 00:09:10,720 --> 00:09:11,680 Um... 128 00:09:13,240 --> 00:09:15,520 She had just moved in. Uh... 129 00:09:16,480 --> 00:09:18,950 She kept to herself. She had been studying the cello. 130 00:09:18,960 --> 00:09:21,760 She was usually in her room, practicing. 131 00:09:23,120 --> 00:09:25,990 I think she still had a boyfriend back home at this point. 132 00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:27,080 Fiancé. 133 00:09:27,640 --> 00:09:28,470 Sorry? 134 00:09:28,480 --> 00:09:31,510 There's an engagement ring on her finger. See? 135 00:09:31,520 --> 00:09:34,390 The eye can't make that level of detail out in your photo, 136 00:09:34,400 --> 00:09:37,510 but there's enough for the algorithmic sharpening to make visible to us in here. 137 00:09:37,520 --> 00:09:39,430 I never knew she was engaged. 138 00:09:39,440 --> 00:09:42,230 Maybe you chose not to see or not to remember. 139 00:09:42,240 --> 00:09:44,390 No, she never said it was that serious. 140 00:09:44,400 --> 00:09:46,120 Perhaps she underplayed it. 141 00:09:47,040 --> 00:09:49,360 - Didn't wanna scare you off. - Uh-huh. 142 00:09:51,480 --> 00:09:55,200 Shall we mark this moment for potential upload for the memorial? 143 00:09:55,720 --> 00:09:58,870 I don't think her family would appreciate seeing a fond memory 144 00:09:58,880 --> 00:10:02,190 of her flirting with me while engaged to someone else. 145 00:10:02,200 --> 00:10:03,430 Hmm, you're right. 146 00:10:03,440 --> 00:10:07,040 Though it would be an honest representation of her character. 147 00:10:09,040 --> 00:10:10,040 Shall we move on? 148 00:10:15,480 --> 00:10:16,800 Jesus Christ. 149 00:10:17,680 --> 00:10:19,280 Yeah. Don't worry. 150 00:10:19,920 --> 00:10:22,960 These transitions should get less disorientating as you go. 151 00:10:23,720 --> 00:10:25,440 Shall we try your next photo? 152 00:10:26,200 --> 00:10:27,160 Okay. 153 00:10:28,320 --> 00:10:29,750 Looks like another party. 154 00:10:29,760 --> 00:10:34,030 Uh, yeah, I can't remember what for. Any excuse would do, you know? 155 00:10:34,040 --> 00:10:35,190 That was The Coop. 156 00:10:35,200 --> 00:10:39,040 Okay. A lot of faces. Why don't you talk me through who's who? 157 00:10:39,560 --> 00:10:41,600 Uh, okay. 158 00:10:43,240 --> 00:10:45,470 That's Emma with the blonde hair. 159 00:10:46,600 --> 00:10:49,240 And the guy with the bong, that's Jamo. 160 00:10:51,040 --> 00:10:53,440 And the girl lying back there is Amanda. 161 00:10:54,080 --> 00:10:56,880 You'd have liked her. She was British, like you. 162 00:10:59,160 --> 00:11:01,080 But there's no Carol. 163 00:11:01,720 --> 00:11:02,760 Or you. 164 00:11:04,200 --> 00:11:08,960 No, we're not in the photo, but we were definitely both at this party. 165 00:11:09,520 --> 00:11:10,520 Mm. 166 00:11:11,720 --> 00:11:15,070 Looks like there was a record playing. "Fools Gold" by-- 167 00:11:15,080 --> 00:11:16,560 The Stone Roses. 168 00:11:17,200 --> 00:11:18,640 It's one of Amanda's. 169 00:11:19,240 --> 00:11:20,710 Music's great for jogging the memory. 170 00:11:36,240 --> 00:11:37,160 There. 171 00:11:38,680 --> 00:11:39,520 Right. 172 00:11:40,240 --> 00:11:41,200 Yeah. 173 00:11:43,400 --> 00:11:44,720 We were through there, 174 00:11:45,640 --> 00:11:46,720 down the hall. 175 00:11:49,480 --> 00:11:52,360 That was the first time me and Carol really got talking. 176 00:11:52,880 --> 00:11:54,720 I was so nervous. 177 00:11:55,560 --> 00:12:00,120 My brain was screaming behind my ears, "Don't fuck this up, man." 178 00:12:04,000 --> 00:12:05,480 But I didn't fuck it up. 179 00:12:07,160 --> 00:12:09,080 Talking with her was easy. 180 00:12:09,920 --> 00:12:11,280 She was funny. 181 00:12:12,600 --> 00:12:14,760 Can you remember what you talked about? 182 00:12:17,360 --> 00:12:18,560 No, but 183 00:12:20,200 --> 00:12:22,200 she was like no one I'd ever known. 184 00:12:23,120 --> 00:12:24,840 Or even thought of knowing. 185 00:12:31,120 --> 00:12:32,840 That was our first night together. 186 00:12:40,840 --> 00:12:43,070 I can't use this either, can I? 187 00:12:43,080 --> 00:12:46,040 "I screwed the deceased. May she rest in peace." 188 00:12:46,680 --> 00:12:47,680 Probably not. 189 00:12:51,040 --> 00:12:53,040 Um, let's try your last photo. 190 00:12:53,800 --> 00:12:55,280 Uh... 191 00:12:56,560 --> 00:12:57,670 Me again. 192 00:12:57,680 --> 00:12:59,390 What the hell was I wearing? 193 00:13:00,800 --> 00:13:03,830 Don't have a clue who took this. I didn't notice anyone taking it. 194 00:13:03,840 --> 00:13:05,350 But still no sign of Carol. 195 00:13:05,360 --> 00:13:06,910 No. But I was listening... 196 00:13:09,400 --> 00:13:10,320 ...to her. 197 00:13:15,360 --> 00:13:16,920 She was in her room. 198 00:13:17,920 --> 00:13:20,040 On her cello, practicing. 199 00:13:21,840 --> 00:13:22,840 Lost in it. 200 00:13:24,040 --> 00:13:25,880 She didn't know I was watching. 201 00:13:30,960 --> 00:13:35,160 - She's in there, but I can't see her. - Can you remember what she was playing? 202 00:13:36,560 --> 00:13:40,550 This thing she used to play over and over. It was a beautiful piece of music. 203 00:13:40,560 --> 00:13:43,480 If you can remember the name of the piece, I can look it up. 204 00:13:44,000 --> 00:13:45,960 Listening might fill out the memory. 205 00:13:47,760 --> 00:13:50,000 No, it won't be on a service. 206 00:13:51,000 --> 00:13:52,360 She wrote it herself. 207 00:13:53,280 --> 00:13:54,710 It was a piece she composed? 208 00:13:54,720 --> 00:13:56,640 Yeah. She was good. 209 00:13:58,440 --> 00:13:59,680 She was good. 210 00:14:03,120 --> 00:14:06,390 It's a shame you don't have more photos, but since that's all you have, 211 00:14:06,400 --> 00:14:08,590 perhaps we should try some other form of stimuli-- 212 00:14:08,600 --> 00:14:09,600 It's not. 213 00:14:10,440 --> 00:14:11,280 Sorry? 214 00:14:14,520 --> 00:14:16,240 I've got other pictures. 215 00:14:17,280 --> 00:14:18,150 Of her. 216 00:14:18,160 --> 00:14:20,400 Great! Then let's look at those. 217 00:14:21,960 --> 00:14:23,040 They won't help. 218 00:14:40,400 --> 00:14:42,560 See what I mean? 219 00:14:44,640 --> 00:14:45,520 Yeah. 220 00:14:48,800 --> 00:14:50,630 A year or so after we broke up, 221 00:14:50,640 --> 00:14:54,070 if it had her face in it, I either threw it out or I did that. 222 00:14:54,080 --> 00:14:55,990 - You were upset with her. 223 00:14:56,000 --> 00:14:57,960 That's one way of putting it, yeah. 224 00:15:02,120 --> 00:15:04,950 You won't ever know how hard I fell for that girl. 225 00:15:04,960 --> 00:15:07,000 Like, beyond everything. 226 00:15:09,040 --> 00:15:12,550 And she said... she always said she felt the same, 227 00:15:12,560 --> 00:15:14,720 and I believed she felt the same, 228 00:15:15,480 --> 00:15:16,840 and then she drops me. 229 00:15:20,560 --> 00:15:23,550 Into a pit. Just a fucking pit. 230 00:15:23,560 --> 00:15:24,950 Just cold, bang. 231 00:15:24,960 --> 00:15:26,480 Just, "See ya." 232 00:15:27,920 --> 00:15:29,640 Not a word. Just walks away. 233 00:15:32,440 --> 00:15:35,750 And she went on with her life while mine just stopped. 234 00:15:35,760 --> 00:15:37,590 So that was me. 235 00:15:37,600 --> 00:15:40,200 Lost. No hope. Nothing. 236 00:15:41,800 --> 00:15:46,480 So then came the drinking, all that shit, the desperation of it. 237 00:15:47,600 --> 00:15:48,840 The fucking shame. 238 00:15:49,640 --> 00:15:51,590 Me and Carol were together three years. 239 00:15:51,600 --> 00:15:55,430 It took me 15 to climb out of the hole she put me in. 240 00:15:55,440 --> 00:15:59,560 - So, yes. I was upset. - And you never stayed in touch? 241 00:16:02,080 --> 00:16:03,190 Uh, no. 242 00:16:03,200 --> 00:16:05,280 No, we did not. 243 00:16:06,080 --> 00:16:08,950 Reexamining the past isn't always comfortable, but-- 244 00:16:08,960 --> 00:16:10,710 Okay, sorry. 245 00:16:10,720 --> 00:16:12,120 But, yeah, 246 00:16:13,520 --> 00:16:16,750 there were good times... when we were together. 247 00:16:16,760 --> 00:16:18,720 I know that. But, uh... 248 00:16:21,000 --> 00:16:22,120 that's all gone. 249 00:16:23,080 --> 00:16:25,400 I can't even picture her face anymore. 250 00:16:26,720 --> 00:16:27,990 Do you want to stop? 251 00:16:32,120 --> 00:16:32,960 No. 252 00:16:33,560 --> 00:16:35,470 Well, do you have any particular memories 253 00:16:35,480 --> 00:16:37,950 associated with what's left of these photos? 254 00:16:37,960 --> 00:16:39,440 I don't-- Um... 255 00:16:40,360 --> 00:16:41,830 Used to, maybe? I don't know. 256 00:16:41,840 --> 00:16:43,670 It's just the more you can recall, 257 00:16:43,680 --> 00:16:47,240 the more likely it is we can restore your memory of her face. 258 00:16:51,400 --> 00:16:53,760 All right, then. Let's... let's try this one. 259 00:16:54,480 --> 00:16:55,390 Which one's you? 260 00:16:56,680 --> 00:16:57,950 Sorry, I'm joking. 261 00:16:57,960 --> 00:16:59,350 Oh, you're hilarious. 262 00:16:59,360 --> 00:17:01,710 What do you remember about the day this was taken? 263 00:17:01,720 --> 00:17:02,710 It was wet. 264 00:17:02,720 --> 00:17:04,110 Well, that's a start. 265 00:17:04,120 --> 00:17:06,200 Let's see what else you can recall. 266 00:17:08,680 --> 00:17:10,310 So where exactly are we? 267 00:17:10,320 --> 00:17:12,030 Uh, the pier at Cape Cod. 268 00:17:13,400 --> 00:17:15,110 Well, that's where you live now. 269 00:17:15,120 --> 00:17:19,110 Yeah, well, I inherited my folks' house, but they were out of town, 270 00:17:19,120 --> 00:17:22,760 so we took the opportunity to take a cheap little vacation. 271 00:17:24,800 --> 00:17:27,000 My first getaway with a girlfriend. 272 00:17:28,200 --> 00:17:29,400 Who took the photo? 273 00:17:30,360 --> 00:17:32,470 Uh, just a tourist. 274 00:17:32,480 --> 00:17:35,440 Some passerby we handed the camera to and asked. 275 00:17:39,000 --> 00:17:41,390 I liked this photo more than Carol did. 276 00:17:41,400 --> 00:17:44,400 - She wasn't into hot dogs? - No, it was the beer. 277 00:17:45,240 --> 00:17:47,230 "You could've put that bottle down for the picture." 278 00:17:47,240 --> 00:17:49,270 Well, yeah. She had a point. 279 00:17:49,280 --> 00:17:50,360 Yeah. 280 00:17:51,240 --> 00:17:53,720 You know, it was on this trip that we knew we were serious. 281 00:17:56,000 --> 00:18:00,080 Lying in bed, fascinated by each other's eyes. 282 00:18:01,240 --> 00:18:03,750 "I love you" back and forth, all that. 283 00:18:03,760 --> 00:18:06,000 Nothing else existed. Just us. 284 00:18:06,560 --> 00:18:07,840 That's all we needed. 285 00:18:11,000 --> 00:18:12,120 We made plans. 286 00:18:13,640 --> 00:18:15,680 Man, we were so young. 287 00:18:20,320 --> 00:18:22,070 So what were the plans? 288 00:18:22,080 --> 00:18:25,030 Well, we decided to get our own place together. 289 00:18:25,040 --> 00:18:28,000 Oh, black and white? That's a bit arty. 290 00:18:30,680 --> 00:18:33,320 This was it. Tiny place over a piano store. 291 00:18:34,320 --> 00:18:38,190 Uh, I took the picture, so I would have been about there. 292 00:18:38,200 --> 00:18:39,360 Mm. 293 00:18:39,960 --> 00:18:42,440 Can you remember what color she's painting with here? 294 00:18:42,960 --> 00:18:46,190 The walls were nicotine-yellow when we moved in. 295 00:18:46,200 --> 00:18:48,960 First place of our own for both of us. 296 00:18:49,840 --> 00:18:55,120 We wanted to make our mark, so we painted the whole place... blue. 297 00:18:56,200 --> 00:18:58,640 Yeah, that's it. Blue. 298 00:18:59,240 --> 00:19:00,710 Yes! 299 00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:07,280 Oh my God, the landlord lost his shit. We weren't supposed to redecorate. 300 00:19:08,520 --> 00:19:09,910 It was a stupid idea, really. 301 00:19:09,920 --> 00:19:12,550 It made it look even smaller than it already was. 302 00:19:12,560 --> 00:19:15,000 - The two of you were happy here? - Mm-hmm. 303 00:19:15,560 --> 00:19:16,640 Just me and her. 304 00:19:17,360 --> 00:19:18,360 And the cello. 305 00:19:18,960 --> 00:19:22,680 Yeah, we both kept up the music. She'd joined the band by now. 306 00:19:23,560 --> 00:19:26,320 - You were in a band together? - Oh yeah. I'll show you. 307 00:19:27,560 --> 00:19:29,350 Here, it's one of our gigs. 308 00:19:29,360 --> 00:19:32,280 It's about... '91, I think. 309 00:19:34,840 --> 00:19:36,280 I stabbed it with a pen. 310 00:19:37,160 --> 00:19:38,350 Will it still work? 311 00:19:38,360 --> 00:19:39,470 Should do. 312 00:19:39,480 --> 00:19:41,720 - There we are. 313 00:19:43,720 --> 00:19:45,670 So Carol played keyboards? 314 00:19:45,680 --> 00:19:47,350 Yeah, that was my idea. 315 00:19:47,360 --> 00:19:48,280 Not cello? 316 00:19:48,960 --> 00:19:51,080 Cello wouldn't have fitted our sound. 317 00:19:51,720 --> 00:19:53,310 You could adapt the sound. 318 00:19:53,320 --> 00:19:54,470 She could play anything. 319 00:19:54,480 --> 00:19:56,830 It might not have been the cello, but she was fine with it. 320 00:19:56,840 --> 00:19:58,200 She told you that? 321 00:19:59,480 --> 00:20:00,710 Sorry, it's not a trial. 322 00:20:00,720 --> 00:20:01,920 No, it's not. 323 00:20:05,600 --> 00:20:07,310 We were getting quite a following. 324 00:20:12,520 --> 00:20:15,600 I'm not saying we were a big deal, but maybe we could've been. 325 00:20:18,760 --> 00:20:22,110 Have you got a recording? It might bring back more of the moment. 326 00:20:22,120 --> 00:20:23,670 Not anymore, no. 327 00:20:23,680 --> 00:20:27,560 Zeke quit the band, moved to Seattle, decided he was God, 328 00:20:28,320 --> 00:20:29,710 and that was it for us. 329 00:20:29,720 --> 00:20:31,520 So, no, no recording. 330 00:20:33,400 --> 00:20:35,150 It's just as well. 331 00:20:35,160 --> 00:20:37,590 Hearing his voice gives me hives, to be honest. 332 00:20:37,600 --> 00:20:39,750 He went on to become a big deal, didn't he? 333 00:20:39,760 --> 00:20:42,000 Yeah, well, assholes prosper. 334 00:20:43,800 --> 00:20:46,080 Maybe we could've kept going without him, but 335 00:20:47,240 --> 00:20:48,560 Carol's heart wasn't in it. 336 00:20:49,080 --> 00:20:53,030 - Maybe you should have let her play cello. - Maybe you could say "cello" again. 337 00:20:53,040 --> 00:20:55,190 - Well, the cello was important to her. - I know. 338 00:20:55,200 --> 00:20:57,830 She played it her whole life. Taught her daughter to play it. 339 00:20:57,840 --> 00:21:01,680 Are you supposed to be mildly annoying? Is that how they coded you? 340 00:21:02,720 --> 00:21:04,040 I wasn't really coded. 341 00:21:04,640 --> 00:21:06,750 - More generated. - Okay. 342 00:21:06,760 --> 00:21:09,000 Generated from some digital asshole. 343 00:21:14,680 --> 00:21:15,520 Sorry. 344 00:21:17,280 --> 00:21:18,600 Apology accepted. 345 00:21:20,400 --> 00:21:22,200 Let's try another picture. 346 00:21:25,960 --> 00:21:29,630 Okay, so these are definitely all '91. 347 00:21:29,640 --> 00:21:32,430 - Halloween at the Undervault. - Oh, this is good. 348 00:21:32,440 --> 00:21:36,040 With multiple photos, we'll get a composite of the entire night. 349 00:21:37,720 --> 00:21:39,750 Yeah, Jamo took a whole bunch. 350 00:21:39,760 --> 00:21:42,640 Wild night. A lot of drinking. And I mean a lot. 351 00:21:44,080 --> 00:21:48,590 Jesus, that's Carol in red there. I was so mad, I used a cigarette on this. 352 00:21:48,600 --> 00:21:51,630 - You burned your own face out too? - That's not me. 353 00:21:54,600 --> 00:21:56,750 That's me in the hockey mask. 354 00:21:56,760 --> 00:21:58,510 I had the bar job by now. 355 00:21:58,520 --> 00:21:59,830 So who's Beetlejuice? 356 00:21:59,840 --> 00:22:03,440 Just some dickbag trying his luck with my girlfriend. 357 00:22:04,120 --> 00:22:08,310 Even though you're standing right there dressed like Jason from Friday the 13th? 358 00:22:08,320 --> 00:22:12,200 Exactly. I was that close, and she still just sat with this guy. 359 00:22:12,720 --> 00:22:13,710 Right in front of me. 360 00:22:13,720 --> 00:22:15,830 Looks like you had company too. 361 00:22:15,840 --> 00:22:16,920 Who's she? 362 00:22:17,520 --> 00:22:18,510 Oh, that's Emma. 363 00:22:18,520 --> 00:22:20,870 She was in The Coop photos earlier. 364 00:22:20,880 --> 00:22:22,560 Yeah, she worked there too. 365 00:22:25,400 --> 00:22:26,880 The two of you get on? 366 00:22:27,480 --> 00:22:28,480 We worked together. 367 00:22:31,320 --> 00:22:32,960 Oh Jesus. Not you too. 368 00:22:37,280 --> 00:22:40,590 Carol thought I encouraged her, which I didn't. 369 00:22:40,600 --> 00:22:43,750 It was a bar job, for Christ's sake. You joke around. You know? 370 00:22:43,760 --> 00:22:45,240 So she was jealous? 371 00:22:46,400 --> 00:22:48,350 We fought about it that night. 372 00:22:48,360 --> 00:22:51,880 I was pissed she'd been sitting all night with Mr. Asshole. 373 00:22:52,400 --> 00:22:54,400 Looks like she wants to get away from him. 374 00:22:55,440 --> 00:22:56,280 What? 375 00:22:57,000 --> 00:23:00,200 She's leaning back, like his breath smells. 376 00:23:01,800 --> 00:23:03,470 Okay, that's one snapshot. 377 00:23:03,480 --> 00:23:05,550 Believe me, she could've moved anytime. 378 00:23:05,560 --> 00:23:07,830 - She was there the whole night with him. - The whole night? 379 00:23:07,840 --> 00:23:09,000 Absolutely. 380 00:23:11,120 --> 00:23:12,350 I think so. 381 00:23:12,360 --> 00:23:13,870 See that area? 382 00:23:13,880 --> 00:23:16,750 Jamo must've photographed it at some other point that night. 383 00:23:16,760 --> 00:23:19,320 Isn't that Carol with her back to us in red? 384 00:23:21,120 --> 00:23:23,360 Okay, not the whole night, literally. 385 00:23:26,720 --> 00:23:28,680 It was just a stupid fight. 386 00:23:31,680 --> 00:23:33,630 She went on and on, 387 00:23:33,640 --> 00:23:36,870 and then she blamed me that she didn't get an early night 388 00:23:36,880 --> 00:23:40,590 'cause she had some audition tryout thing the next day. 389 00:23:40,600 --> 00:23:42,080 Brooklyn Philharmonic. 390 00:23:42,840 --> 00:23:44,030 For the cello. 391 00:23:44,040 --> 00:23:45,270 And she didn't get it. 392 00:23:45,280 --> 00:23:47,190 She must've been sad about that. 393 00:23:47,200 --> 00:23:48,830 Not for long. 394 00:23:48,840 --> 00:23:51,040 It opened the door to other things for her. 395 00:23:52,200 --> 00:23:55,590 When the orchestra gig didn't work out, she was bummed. 396 00:23:55,600 --> 00:23:57,160 She didn't have any work. 397 00:23:58,160 --> 00:24:01,190 But then Amanda, the British girl from The Coop, 398 00:24:01,200 --> 00:24:02,800 she'd moved back home, 399 00:24:03,480 --> 00:24:05,070 pulled a couple of strings. 400 00:24:05,080 --> 00:24:06,870 Got Carol a six-month placement 401 00:24:06,880 --> 00:24:10,310 in the orchestra pit for Phantom of the Opera, of all things. 402 00:24:10,320 --> 00:24:11,920 London's West End. 403 00:24:13,080 --> 00:24:15,040 Total tourist bullshit, but 404 00:24:16,200 --> 00:24:17,750 she was excited. 405 00:24:17,760 --> 00:24:19,230 Yes, she was. 406 00:24:19,240 --> 00:24:20,760 You didn't want her to go? 407 00:24:21,480 --> 00:24:24,200 Oh, she kept saying, "It's just for a few months," but 408 00:24:24,880 --> 00:24:28,160 it's easy to say that when you're the one going on an adventure. 409 00:24:32,240 --> 00:24:33,910 She sent me a postcard every week. 410 00:24:33,920 --> 00:24:36,320 Upbeat, but saying she missed me. 411 00:24:36,880 --> 00:24:38,670 Little poems and such. 412 00:24:38,680 --> 00:24:41,150 Maybe we could scan in one of the... 413 00:24:41,160 --> 00:24:42,920 - Oh. - I was thorough. 414 00:24:43,680 --> 00:24:45,630 So you didn't see her for a while? 415 00:24:45,640 --> 00:24:48,470 No, but we arranged for me to fly out there in the fall, 416 00:24:48,480 --> 00:24:50,280 see her for a long weekend, but 417 00:24:51,640 --> 00:24:53,640 it felt so far away, you know? 418 00:24:54,320 --> 00:24:55,800 A long time on my own. 419 00:24:56,760 --> 00:24:57,920 What's this? 420 00:24:58,720 --> 00:24:59,560 My birthday. 421 00:25:01,000 --> 00:25:03,270 So you weren't alone the whole time she was gone. 422 00:25:03,280 --> 00:25:04,270 What do you mean? 423 00:25:04,280 --> 00:25:06,280 Well, someone took this photo. 424 00:25:14,760 --> 00:25:15,830 So that's... 425 00:25:15,840 --> 00:25:17,120 Emma. 426 00:25:17,640 --> 00:25:19,800 Oh God, yeah. 427 00:25:20,400 --> 00:25:21,320 Uh... 428 00:25:22,320 --> 00:25:24,320 Oh Christ, yeah. 429 00:25:24,880 --> 00:25:26,670 Um, don't look at me like that. 430 00:25:26,680 --> 00:25:28,470 - Like what? - Like you are. 431 00:25:28,480 --> 00:25:30,430 I'm not looking at you like anything. 432 00:25:34,080 --> 00:25:36,510 Okay, so it was my birthday. 433 00:25:36,520 --> 00:25:38,110 I had a few drinks at work. 434 00:25:38,120 --> 00:25:41,110 Uh, not my idea. They were practically forcing shots on me. 435 00:25:41,120 --> 00:25:42,030 Sure. 436 00:25:42,040 --> 00:25:44,470 And Emma came back to the apartment, and, you know... 437 00:25:44,480 --> 00:25:46,230 Uh, we weren't... 438 00:25:46,240 --> 00:25:49,230 It was a dumb thing, okay? 439 00:25:49,240 --> 00:25:51,480 It was just a one-off thing. 440 00:25:54,680 --> 00:25:58,870 I mean, we'd... we'd have just regretted it, me and Emma, in secret. 441 00:25:58,880 --> 00:26:01,510 It wouldn't have been a big fucking deal if... 442 00:26:01,520 --> 00:26:02,670 If what? 443 00:26:10,840 --> 00:26:12,830 I mean, Carol never called. 444 00:26:12,840 --> 00:26:14,230 Couldn't afford to. 445 00:26:14,240 --> 00:26:16,830 - Long distance back then was a fortune. 446 00:26:16,840 --> 00:26:18,510 But this night, 447 00:26:18,520 --> 00:26:22,110 she gets up early and called to sing me "Happy Birthday," 448 00:26:22,120 --> 00:26:24,110 and Emma answers the call. 449 00:26:24,120 --> 00:26:25,320 I don't know why. 450 00:26:26,040 --> 00:26:28,680 - Making mischief? - Yeah, I don't know, maybe. 451 00:26:30,320 --> 00:26:32,120 Anyhow, shit hit the fan. 452 00:26:34,320 --> 00:26:36,590 Me and Carol screaming at each other down the line. 453 00:26:36,600 --> 00:26:40,520 She yelled all kinds of shit. I yelled all kinds of shit back. 454 00:26:42,840 --> 00:26:45,480 Just ugly, scorched-earth stuff. 455 00:26:46,920 --> 00:26:47,800 Ugly. 456 00:26:50,600 --> 00:26:51,710 She hung up on me. 457 00:26:51,720 --> 00:26:53,230 Or I hung up on her. 458 00:26:53,240 --> 00:26:55,680 I don't know. I can't fucking remember. 459 00:27:04,200 --> 00:27:05,640 But, yeah, anyway, 460 00:27:06,520 --> 00:27:07,480 not good. 461 00:27:08,120 --> 00:27:11,880 Do you want to mark this memory for potential upload? For the memorial? 462 00:27:12,400 --> 00:27:13,750 I never said I was perfect. 463 00:27:13,760 --> 00:27:16,110 You've said a lot about Carol's failings. 464 00:27:16,120 --> 00:27:18,830 "She did this, she did that, she's the root of all evil." 465 00:27:18,840 --> 00:27:20,830 Okay, you don't understand. 466 00:27:20,840 --> 00:27:23,230 What did she do that was so awful, so heinous, 467 00:27:23,240 --> 00:27:25,430 you become this wounded dog? 468 00:27:25,440 --> 00:27:27,240 I haven't shown you yet. 469 00:27:36,800 --> 00:27:39,950 You remember I told you we arranged for me to fly out there? 470 00:27:39,960 --> 00:27:41,910 - Mm-hmm. - I already had my ticket, so... 471 00:27:41,920 --> 00:27:44,070 - So Carol knew you were coming. - Right. 472 00:27:44,080 --> 00:27:46,160 A few months or so after my birthday. 473 00:27:47,200 --> 00:27:49,910 Now, she was staying in this British family's spare room 474 00:27:49,920 --> 00:27:51,110 in the sticks somewhere, 475 00:27:51,120 --> 00:27:54,840 so I booked us a stupid suite in a hotel I couldn't afford. 476 00:27:55,400 --> 00:27:56,430 Big romantic. 477 00:27:56,440 --> 00:27:57,870 Nice. 478 00:27:57,880 --> 00:27:59,360 I went to the matinee. 479 00:28:00,440 --> 00:28:03,320 Not my thing, and I couldn't even see her, of course. 480 00:28:03,880 --> 00:28:08,640 She was in the pit somewhere, but... I met her at the stage door after. 481 00:28:09,200 --> 00:28:12,030 I took her suitcase back to the hotel, 482 00:28:12,040 --> 00:28:13,080 and... 483 00:28:15,320 --> 00:28:17,030 we went out for dinner. 484 00:28:17,040 --> 00:28:18,040 Anywhere nice? 485 00:28:22,400 --> 00:28:24,030 To a fancy restaurant. 486 00:28:24,040 --> 00:28:26,320 I'd read this article about it on the flight. 487 00:28:26,880 --> 00:28:30,040 When I landed, I called to see if they had a table for two. 488 00:28:30,960 --> 00:28:35,350 I think they bumped someone when I told them what I was gonna do. 489 00:28:35,360 --> 00:28:36,520 What do you mean? 490 00:28:58,800 --> 00:28:59,880 We were over here. 491 00:29:01,920 --> 00:29:03,600 So walk through what happened. 492 00:29:09,040 --> 00:29:10,640 Well, uh... 493 00:29:13,560 --> 00:29:16,240 she looked kind of the same but different. 494 00:29:18,040 --> 00:29:20,470 She said she'd put on weight, but I couldn't see that. 495 00:29:20,480 --> 00:29:22,160 I thought she looked beautiful. 496 00:29:23,800 --> 00:29:27,910 And I ordered a bottle of champagne. First time I'd done that anywhere. 497 00:29:27,920 --> 00:29:31,320 But she didn't touch it. She didn't wanna drink anything. 498 00:29:32,400 --> 00:29:36,110 And I was like, "Come on." "I've come all this way. Have one." 499 00:29:36,120 --> 00:29:37,200 But no. 500 00:29:39,400 --> 00:29:42,960 So I had to bite my tongue because, you know, it was irritating. 501 00:29:44,200 --> 00:29:47,150 I had the ring in my pocket, so I was nervous. 502 00:29:47,160 --> 00:29:49,430 I'm draining the glasses. 503 00:29:49,440 --> 00:29:52,710 And, finally, I pluck up the nerve, 504 00:29:52,720 --> 00:29:55,640 and I take out the ring, and I almost dropped it. 505 00:29:56,160 --> 00:29:57,440 I was so jittery. 506 00:30:00,800 --> 00:30:03,400 And she looks at it, and... 507 00:30:05,800 --> 00:30:06,960 she goes quiet. 508 00:30:08,520 --> 00:30:10,590 She doesn't say anything. 509 00:30:10,600 --> 00:30:12,560 She doesn't even look at me. 510 00:30:15,520 --> 00:30:17,550 And now the waitresses are shooting looks over 511 00:30:17,560 --> 00:30:21,230 'cause they know I'm there to propose, so I'm on display, you know? 512 00:30:21,240 --> 00:30:24,310 My cheeks are burning. My throat is dry, so I'm drinking more. 513 00:30:24,320 --> 00:30:28,040 And then, in the end, I just... I ask her, "Just say something." 514 00:30:31,000 --> 00:30:32,840 "Say anything." 515 00:30:34,320 --> 00:30:36,070 And she's just staring at the floor, 516 00:30:36,080 --> 00:30:38,510 so I bang the table with my fist, 517 00:30:38,520 --> 00:30:41,240 and now everybody's watching, 518 00:30:42,920 --> 00:30:44,320 and she just gets up... 519 00:30:48,480 --> 00:30:49,600 and walks out. 520 00:30:55,520 --> 00:30:59,280 There's just silence. There's just the clanging in the kitchen. 521 00:31:01,800 --> 00:31:03,320 And I'm there, and 522 00:31:04,440 --> 00:31:06,910 everyone's quiet, the staff can't make eye contact, 523 00:31:06,920 --> 00:31:10,600 just this stink of humiliation on me. 524 00:31:18,280 --> 00:31:20,560 So I sat there, and I finished that bottle. 525 00:31:22,320 --> 00:31:25,150 They told me I didn't have to pay for it, but I insisted I would. 526 00:31:25,160 --> 00:31:28,560 - I didn't want their pity. - No, because you could provide your own. 527 00:31:32,080 --> 00:31:32,920 What? 528 00:31:37,480 --> 00:31:40,280 You're talking a lot about how sad you were. 529 00:31:41,240 --> 00:31:42,350 I was destroyed. 530 00:31:42,360 --> 00:31:43,670 And how was she? 531 00:31:43,680 --> 00:31:47,470 I'm not saying that she was a big, happy fucking sandwich, 532 00:31:47,480 --> 00:31:49,390 but she walked out on me. 533 00:31:49,400 --> 00:31:50,550 Not a word as to why. 534 00:31:50,560 --> 00:31:54,710 Would you have listened if she told you? A bottle of champagne down. 535 00:31:54,720 --> 00:31:57,240 - Of course. - So why do you think she left? 536 00:31:57,760 --> 00:31:59,160 Maybe she was cheating. 537 00:32:00,840 --> 00:32:04,120 Maybe she was sick of me. Maybe she was cruel. 538 00:32:04,960 --> 00:32:08,830 She... she knew that I was coming. She could have ended it on the phone. 539 00:32:08,840 --> 00:32:10,950 She made me fly all that way. She knew-- 540 00:32:10,960 --> 00:32:13,350 But not that you were coming to propose. 541 00:32:13,360 --> 00:32:15,160 Like that's a big difference. 542 00:32:17,120 --> 00:32:19,230 You said this was autumn '92? 543 00:32:19,240 --> 00:32:20,830 Fall, yes, like October. 544 00:32:20,840 --> 00:32:23,440 She looked sort of different. Wouldn't drink. 545 00:32:24,400 --> 00:32:25,800 She was pregnant. 546 00:32:26,920 --> 00:32:27,880 With me. 547 00:32:34,280 --> 00:32:35,320 Kelly Royce. 548 00:32:36,000 --> 00:32:37,280 Carol's daughter. 549 00:32:37,880 --> 00:32:40,000 The one she taught to play cello. 550 00:32:42,920 --> 00:32:44,920 Don't worry. You're not my dad. 551 00:32:45,520 --> 00:32:46,870 He was a one-night stand. 552 00:32:46,880 --> 00:32:49,600 Played xylophone in the orchestra, believe it or not. 553 00:32:54,080 --> 00:32:55,270 You're Carol's daughter? 554 00:32:55,280 --> 00:32:57,480 Yes. Well, kind of. 555 00:32:59,200 --> 00:33:00,200 I'm not real. 556 00:33:01,240 --> 00:33:03,070 I'm a disposable avatar. 557 00:33:03,080 --> 00:33:05,360 A temp guide. An echo, really. 558 00:33:07,080 --> 00:33:08,950 I'm programmed with her thoughts and opinions 559 00:33:08,960 --> 00:33:11,150 so I can decide what she'd like to include 560 00:33:11,160 --> 00:33:13,830 without her having to be exposed to everything herself, 561 00:33:13,840 --> 00:33:15,960 which, as you can imagine, 562 00:33:16,640 --> 00:33:17,990 might be upsetting. 563 00:33:18,000 --> 00:33:19,520 Why didn't you say? 564 00:33:20,160 --> 00:33:22,280 You said, "Skip the intro." 565 00:33:30,200 --> 00:33:33,110 So you know everything that the real daughter knows? 566 00:33:33,120 --> 00:33:34,470 Mm-hmm. More or less. 567 00:33:34,480 --> 00:33:36,830 So you already knew everything I've been telling you here. 568 00:33:36,840 --> 00:33:37,790 Well, some of it, 569 00:33:37,800 --> 00:33:41,400 but, to be honest, she never really spoke much about this time in her life. 570 00:33:44,080 --> 00:33:46,990 - Right. - I think looking back was painful for her. 571 00:33:47,000 --> 00:33:49,750 It doesn't mean your time together wasn't meaningful. 572 00:33:49,760 --> 00:33:51,800 - Probably the opposite. - Mm. 573 00:33:57,480 --> 00:33:58,870 This guy, your dad. 574 00:34:00,240 --> 00:34:03,230 - What was he like? I just wanna know. - Why? 575 00:34:03,240 --> 00:34:05,990 - She cheated with him. - You mean, followed your lead? 576 00:34:06,000 --> 00:34:07,600 Could you just tell me? 577 00:34:08,480 --> 00:34:11,950 I never knew much about him. He was called Brian. 578 00:34:11,960 --> 00:34:13,590 - Brian? - Yeah. 579 00:34:13,600 --> 00:34:15,190 And they were never together. 580 00:34:15,200 --> 00:34:17,790 And by the time I was born, he was in Manchester. 581 00:34:17,800 --> 00:34:20,190 I saw him maybe five or six times. 582 00:34:20,200 --> 00:34:24,550 And the last time, he was ranting about some online rabbit-hole conspiracy theory. 583 00:34:24,560 --> 00:34:27,110 And the year after that, I heard he died of Covid. 584 00:34:27,120 --> 00:34:28,360 Oh boy. 585 00:34:29,160 --> 00:34:31,070 He sounds like a real catch. 586 00:34:31,080 --> 00:34:32,510 Great choice, Carol. 587 00:34:32,520 --> 00:34:34,320 Great choice. 588 00:34:40,840 --> 00:34:41,720 Sorry. 589 00:34:44,880 --> 00:34:45,720 It's okay. 590 00:34:46,920 --> 00:34:48,200 She'd agree. 591 00:34:51,120 --> 00:34:54,750 She said she wrote to you to explain or at least start the conversation, 592 00:34:54,760 --> 00:34:55,990 and you never replied. 593 00:34:56,000 --> 00:34:58,030 - She never wrote to me. - It's what she told me. 594 00:34:58,040 --> 00:35:00,070 She never wrote! 595 00:35:00,080 --> 00:35:02,230 Or I never got it. I... I didn't get it. 596 00:35:02,240 --> 00:35:03,910 I'd have listened. 597 00:35:03,920 --> 00:35:05,830 Yeah, and said, "Get rid of it." 598 00:35:05,840 --> 00:35:08,990 No! I don't know. We'd have talked it over. 599 00:35:09,000 --> 00:35:12,750 - And you'd have heard her? - Yes, I would! Yes, I would! 600 00:35:17,120 --> 00:35:18,640 I wanna get out of here. 601 00:35:36,760 --> 00:35:39,030 I just wanna see her, you know? 602 00:35:39,040 --> 00:35:41,790 Maybe there's something else that could jog your memory? 603 00:35:41,800 --> 00:35:43,030 I don't know. 604 00:35:43,040 --> 00:35:45,350 Well, um, what about in that box? 605 00:35:46,360 --> 00:35:47,950 Is that, like, a camera there? 606 00:35:47,960 --> 00:35:49,590 - This? - Yeah. 607 00:35:49,600 --> 00:35:52,640 It's a disposable camera. 608 00:35:53,640 --> 00:35:55,640 Big in the '90s. I got it at the airport. 609 00:35:56,320 --> 00:35:58,750 The plan was we would take photos around the city together. 610 00:35:58,760 --> 00:36:01,120 That never happened, of course. We never... 611 00:36:14,840 --> 00:36:15,680 Here. 612 00:36:17,640 --> 00:36:20,760 - I haven't seen one of these in forever. - Can you still process it? 613 00:36:21,440 --> 00:36:24,720 - There's only one photo been taken. - I know, I know, I know. 614 00:36:25,800 --> 00:36:27,680 - I'll have to wind it on. - Okay. 615 00:36:28,320 --> 00:36:31,400 - You'll waste the rest of the film. - But you can retrieve the one photo? 616 00:36:31,920 --> 00:36:32,910 Might take a while. 617 00:36:32,920 --> 00:36:34,470 I'll wait. 618 00:36:34,480 --> 00:36:36,000 Matte or gloss? 619 00:36:36,800 --> 00:36:37,680 Matte. 620 00:36:51,400 --> 00:36:52,400 So? 621 00:36:53,440 --> 00:36:54,920 Was there anything on it? 622 00:37:03,080 --> 00:37:03,950 Here. 623 00:37:03,960 --> 00:37:06,310 I think I took this. Just a nothing photo. 624 00:37:06,320 --> 00:37:07,280 Oh. 625 00:37:09,240 --> 00:37:11,110 Look, we could still go in. 626 00:37:11,120 --> 00:37:12,790 What's the point? 627 00:37:12,800 --> 00:37:16,190 Well, you took it on your trip, so it might give us something. 628 00:37:16,200 --> 00:37:17,110 Sure. 629 00:37:20,080 --> 00:37:21,560 Told you. It's nothing. 630 00:37:24,880 --> 00:37:26,270 This was the hotel room. 631 00:37:26,280 --> 00:37:29,670 When I came back from the restaurant, her case was gone, 632 00:37:29,680 --> 00:37:30,920 so I knew that was that. 633 00:37:34,160 --> 00:37:36,000 And I took it out on the room. 634 00:37:37,840 --> 00:37:38,960 It was pathetic. 635 00:37:41,440 --> 00:37:43,360 What are you even looking for? 636 00:37:43,880 --> 00:37:46,440 I just want to see what your camera picked up. 637 00:37:51,000 --> 00:37:52,200 There's a note here. 638 00:37:52,720 --> 00:37:54,070 It says "Philly." 639 00:37:54,080 --> 00:37:55,910 System sharpened it up. 640 00:37:55,920 --> 00:37:57,990 There's a piece of paper with "Philly" written on it. 641 00:37:58,000 --> 00:38:00,590 - That's what she called me. - I'm pretty sure it's her writing. 642 00:38:00,600 --> 00:38:02,710 Well, I... I never saw that. 643 00:38:02,720 --> 00:38:04,990 - No, Philip, it's just part of an image. 644 00:38:05,000 --> 00:38:06,110 - You-- - Oh, come on. 645 00:38:06,120 --> 00:38:09,630 You won't be able to pick it up. I'm sorry. That's just not how it works. 646 00:38:09,640 --> 00:38:10,720 No, come on. 647 00:38:11,960 --> 00:38:13,120 Please, come on. 648 00:38:19,800 --> 00:38:21,080 Get me out of here. 649 00:38:24,320 --> 00:38:26,510 - Maybe you kept it somewhere. 650 00:38:26,520 --> 00:38:28,150 - No. - Are you sure? 651 00:38:28,160 --> 00:38:29,760 I'd fucking remember. 652 00:38:31,760 --> 00:38:33,200 Sorry. 653 00:38:33,880 --> 00:38:34,880 It's okay. 654 00:38:35,800 --> 00:38:39,200 Let's just walk through what you did after you took the photo. 655 00:38:44,320 --> 00:38:45,400 Um... 656 00:38:47,000 --> 00:38:49,240 I just smashed the room up. Uh... 657 00:38:50,960 --> 00:38:53,280 I went out, drank myself into a blur. 658 00:38:54,520 --> 00:38:55,870 And when I got back, 659 00:38:55,880 --> 00:38:58,590 the maid had cleaned the place up, put it all in a little pile. 660 00:38:58,600 --> 00:39:00,230 I just packed everything up, 661 00:39:00,240 --> 00:39:02,070 I... I put it away, and I never... 662 00:39:08,520 --> 00:39:09,480 Uh... 663 00:39:29,720 --> 00:39:31,840 Philly, I have to tell you something. 664 00:39:32,720 --> 00:39:35,030 I couldn't say earlier. I froze. 665 00:39:35,040 --> 00:39:36,120 I'm sorry. 666 00:39:37,720 --> 00:39:39,600 Please... please don't hate me. 667 00:39:41,840 --> 00:39:44,960 That day I rang and got Emma, I was so mad. 668 00:39:48,040 --> 00:39:50,960 I had a one-night stand with someone in the orchestra here. 669 00:39:52,280 --> 00:39:55,560 It didn't mean anything, and I'm sorry. 670 00:39:59,080 --> 00:40:00,360 I've missed my period. 671 00:40:01,480 --> 00:40:02,880 I don't know what to do. 672 00:40:03,800 --> 00:40:07,800 I love you, and I want us to work, but I don't know how you'll feel. 673 00:40:08,920 --> 00:40:10,960 I think I wanna keep the baby. 674 00:40:11,880 --> 00:40:12,880 I don't know. 675 00:40:14,320 --> 00:40:16,240 But could you live with that if I did? 676 00:40:19,280 --> 00:40:20,830 If you still wanna talk, 677 00:40:20,840 --> 00:40:24,160 meet me tomorrow afternoon at the stage door, after the matinee. 678 00:40:27,760 --> 00:40:30,600 I'll understand if you never wanna see me again. 679 00:40:32,240 --> 00:40:33,120 I hope you do. 680 00:40:34,760 --> 00:40:35,840 I love you, 681 00:40:37,080 --> 00:40:37,920 Carol. 682 00:41:26,400 --> 00:41:27,680 I'm so sorry. 683 00:42:03,120 --> 00:42:04,670 Okay, Philly. 684 00:42:04,680 --> 00:42:08,840 So you asked me to record this piece of music for you. 685 00:42:11,560 --> 00:42:13,280 Careful what you wish for. 686 00:42:15,280 --> 00:42:16,440 Let's see her.